Men and Divorce Court | Greg Ellis | The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast | #238

This episode was recorded on December 14th, 2021.

Greg Ellis and I discuss his recent project, The Respondent, and his critique of the US family law and court system. We cover divorce statistics, mending relationships, the impact of the divorce industry on families, the incentives behind it, and much more.

Greg Ellis is a British author, television director, voice artist, and actor who has appeared in Oscar-winning movies directed by Hollywood superstars. He has produced and written for TV, starred in Broadway, and voiced characters for many movies, TV shows, and video games.

His most recent work, The Respondent, is a multimedia combination of personal experience and a critique of the family law system in America.

Follow Greg Ellis on Twitter:

Check out The Respondent:

And Greg’s nonprofit, Children & Parents United’s (CPU):

[00:00] Intro
[01:29] American Family Law
[04:03] Presumption of Innocence
[05:14] Greg’s Divorce I
[07:42] Autonomy
[07:59] Signs of Trouble in a Marriage
[10:36] Arrest I
[19:11] Child Protective Services
[25:54] The Edge of Existential Terror
[29:28] Second Life
[29:54] The Phoenix
[34:59] Leadership & Patriarchy
[37:00] Incentives & the Divorce Industry
[42:16] Suggestions for Improvement
[43:10] Custody
[44:44] Asset Redistribution
[48:05] Friendship & Support
[58:52] Church & State Intervention
[59:32] A Cautionary Tale
[01:02:09] Greg’s Divorce II
[01:09:25] Mending Relationships
[01:12:14] A Joint Vision
[01:13:48] Rewarding Behavior
[01:15:29] Negotiation & Hugging
[01:21:59] Greg’s Sons
[01:25:57] Restraining Orders
[01:28:36] False Allegations
[01:28:56] Repercussions
[01:29:59] Forgiveness & the Autonomic Nervous System
[01:30:16] Arrest II
[01:33:12] Children & Parents United (CPU)
[01:37:20] Outro
#Custody #GregEllis #TheRespondent #FamilyLaw #Divorce


Discovering Personality:
Self Authoring Suite:
Understand Myself (personality test):

// BOOKS //
Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life:
12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos:
Maps of Meaning: The Architecture of Belief:

// LINKS //

// SOCIAL //

Written by Jordan B Peterson

Dr. Jordan B Peterson is a professor and clinical psychologist. The videos are derived from two sources: 1. His UToronto courses Maps of Meaning (which describes how values, including beliefs about good and evil, regulate emotion and motivation); and Personality & Its Transformations (which describes psychological theories from Eliade, Jung, Freud, Rogers, Gray, Luria, Sokolov, Vinogradova, Panksepp, Nietzsche, Kierkegaard, and Solzhenitsyn as well as psychometric models such as the Big Five). 2. His public lectures on topics of general psychological relevance, including the meaning of music, the significance of hero mythology, and the structure of the world as represented in religion.


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  1. An important conversation for sure! BUT, T if you are dealing with a Narcissist (malignant or covert), there is NO negotiations. They want to see their power over YOU. There is ZERO actual attempt of negotiations. I have seen narcs co-opt the therapist in their couples therapy session and the empath ended up in a suicide watch asylum, while the narc ended up with the approval of the therapist. That was my Nanny's (hired by my mother's) daughter! And yes the narc was a guy and they had no children. Men bc of hatred agains the 'patriarchy' have been dealt a bad hand, no doubt. Negotiations (for sex etc) will lead to absolutely NO resolutions when you are dealing with Narcs who are on the rise and more often than not you are dealing with one of the partners being a Narc.

  2. The one thing which has to be broadly told to husband is to be ice cold.
    The way you win this fight is ro be ice cold when the irrational partner start acting the way this man wife did.
    There should be a campaign explaining how you should act in situations of violence against men.
    What she did was to act violently against him and a way to behave should be thought to men.

  3. Greg Ellis is far more interesting to listen to than Jordan. Wish Jordan would let him speak more instead of interrupting all the time (with idiotic 'sex negotiation' advices). Jordan has good ideas but he needs (IMO) to just shut up and let the guy speak, instead of interjecting pop psychology all the time.

  4. Thank you for providing a platform for true equality. Divorce Court needs to be priority #1 for all men and women. I challenge anyone to sit in a family law courtroom and witness how children are unfairly torn from their fathers. I have three sons that deal with trauma from being torn from their father and placed with inadequate mothers. They have witnessed the relentless fight I have had for 15 years for my children and they want no part of a family of their own. We have to get to a point for when it is a fair deal to be married. In the immediate sense, a prenup is a must for all men spelling out guaranteed custody well before talks of divorce.

  5. The entire "get rich on government grants" industry feeds a top heavy bureaucracy of monsters and ideologues. It is funded by your tax dollars and totalitarian corporate finance. In academia "woke" feminism/communism uses the money to brainwash youth and silence free speech and discourse. SUPPORT SUBSCRIPTION JOURNALISM. DEMAND PUBLIC ACCOUNTABILITY FOR ALL GRANT DOLLARS. BOYCOTT CORPORATIONS THAT FINANCE THE DESTRUCTION OF YOUR COUNTRY.—–TAKE ACTION AND WIN!! (The corruption, as in BLM, is there. Expose the perpetrators !!)

  6. Listen to John Cleese forced to go on tour and take any work in order to recoup some of the wealth that his former ex-wife – with whom he had no children – stole from him. And the woman was a psychologist…

  7. So sad. I am not a man, but have a similar story. I've seen it. It more often happens to men, but there are plenty Narcissistic men as well, and there are many broken women in the same wake.

  8. This is absolutely heart wrenching. I would want to die if my child was taken from me. This happened to a girlfriend of mine. It is typically the father, that's true. But, as Greg acknowledged, there are women who suffer in this manner. My friend has been presumed guilty without trial.

  9. oh yeah he talked about mental health my ex-wife went to the VA hospital and got my records as we were divorced. But they made a ruling that I was no longer to have my kids over a 2014 not attempted suicide but suicide ideology from my 5 deployments 2nd ranger battalion as a sniper losing 17 of my men been blown up 14 times I think you guys probably seen that in the things. But ultimately they ruled it because of PTSD. Even though I've been through counseling for years after that and then it went through I was an alcoholic which I was I will admit that but I haven't drank in 5 years now. So this was two years ago that all this went down.they just out of the blue sided with her and then I had to go down to Orlando Florida from Pennsylvania. Threaten to sue them and show them that symbol dates on these reports. And they backpedal quickly but it blew my mind I was like did you even look at the report and ask yourself how did she get those reports? Of course they don't

  10. Oh yeah newsing establish today I just found out I would bench warrant. For nonpayment of child support $15,000 from a child my youngest that's not really mine that we found out over a year-and-a-half ago through DNA test. But yet non failure on Florida's and is putting me in jail in Pennsylvania. Apparently like there's a warrant I just found out about it. This is how f***-up our judicial system is. Because men and women we have the same rights if anything women have privilege. And they sure do abused it.

  11. “ It is a tragedy! Some young men might decide it is too dangerous to get married!” That’s the point Mr. Peterson, you Trad-con fool! Until the laws change, young men Should not marry, or cohabitate, or intermingle funds. Don’t play soccer in an active mine field, no matter how much the pretty goalie tells you she is “not like those other women.” Don’t skydive with a parachute that has a 52% chance of failing, packed by a person who only packs the chute correctly 20% of the time.

  12. Gosh Jordan , you've made some good comments but please try hard not to interrupt as much … Many might like to hear his story without you editorializing so often before his sentence and thought is finished … It would be such an improvement if you could manage that .

  13. ASTONISHING WORK !!!!!!!! The Last Comment . Just About Sums U Two Fellas Up ! Nearly 16 years now since I last saw My Daughter ( other than for 1 hour ) albeit I am now receiving the odd post from her via Facebook . DONT EVEN START ME on The Family Courts in this country ( UK ) CAFCASS and all that UTTER DRIVEL !!!!!!!!!! THANKS FELLAS . PLEASE ACCEPT MY VERY BEST REGRADS and KEEP IT UP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  14. Sounds Familiar…. Married for 22 years Lost $3.5 m , My Business, My Home And My livelihood. Forced me into Bankruptcy. after 14 years Still Have yet to recover or own a home I have not had a relationship with my adult Daughter since. Ex is a Covert Narcissist with a Law degree and suffers from OCD.

  15. one thing this guy has to realize. I'm sure he has. Like many of us. Even my lawyer that cost me thousands and thousands of dollars. At the end when I had a pair of shorts and that was it. I was told that men do not win we do damage control if that

  16. Know the local laws before you get married or cohabit. Keep as much leverage on your side pray you dont have to use it. All married men are one wingnut away from catastrophe.

  17. my ex wife told me point blank that if I pushed and resisted what she wanted during our divorce she would say that I had been molesting our daughter….wtf kind of horrible person does this? I knew that the system would automatically see me as guilty…I was afraid…I was only 25 and this was in 1996. She still hasn't stopped being a horrible person….except now its to the man she left me for. I feel sorry for the poos bastard, but not too much.

  18. I wish I could like this over and over. But I however I will say that I sent this 2 about 50 of my old Ranger buddies.they didn't even watch the five minutes of it and they replied yup don't we all know.

  19. There's also YouTube videos thousands of them of how to finesse or get over on divorce or whatever for women. Even if they cheat even if there's a prenup everything. But as I stated. There's a reason why there's the divorce rate is 80% buy women initiated.and out of that 80% you could easily say half 50% of that would say it was the unfair or it was b***** if the shoe was on the other foot. But I even had my X1 time I drop the boys off and I pretended that I was talking about my buddy and his ex. Because he was going through it at work with hisEx-wife. With the child support and everything. And I was like man she just keeps taking them to the ringer. But everything I said it was what my ex was doing to me. And my ex was sitting there looking at me in the eyes telling me how f***-up this lady was. And then I said Melissa I'm talking about you. Then all the sudden things changed. LOL she got pissed off and I was like you're not mad at me I'm like you're mad at yourself because you just admitted what you're doing to me and what is commonly done to men. It's f*** up

  20. 37:41 Having coming across JBP 3 years ago during the course of changing my life, I chose to launch a business into CoV-fefe times in order to mentor and feed eight mouths through work rather than retire on a beach. Tempered Patriarchy is coming, stay strong, fellas.

  21. Please pardon Jordan , Greg , he will not allow you to tell your story fully as his need to interject his stories and his interpretation of your situation but not your interpretation is apparently what matters most to him …

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